As you come to know that you are fully and unconditionally loved, you will also come to know that you do not have to fear death. Love is stronger than death; God’s love was there for you before you were born and will be there for you after you have died.
Henri Nouwen – The Weary Christian
It may seem quite strange to many people that Death is included in many Advent reflections. Death is similar to a birthing experience, where we will leave one reality and then be part of another way of being. Yes, it is a mystery to us, yet God is still at the heart of our moving, present and waiting to embrace us as we enter, the ultimate Divine Midwife.
For many people, Death and Dying can be a traumatic experience, and some never wish to talk about Death in any shape or form, however as a recently qualified End-of-life Doula companion, sometimes called a Death Doula, (Doula is a Greek word for female servant) I realised I had been undertaking this role for many years.
A Death Doula, is sometimes called ‘Amicus Mortis’, (in Latin it means a ‘Friend at/in Death’), someone who journeys and supports people emotionally, spiritually and holds that person in the sacred space between life and Death, and allows them to die with their choices in place, with grace and dignity.
As a nurse and minister, I have been a friend of Death since I was 18yrs old, and for me it has always been a privilege. For me, it is the last actof unconditional love that we can give another person, to give of ourselves as they take their final breath, to sit in silence, to hold a hand, or to play their favourite piece of music.
A Doula encourages a person-centered death, where the person who is dying has the control, over who to see or not see, what the environment will be like and supporting family members who are grieving and unsure how to react….a friend who will stay by their side.
Prayer
God who is the source of unconditional love,                 Enable me to love the dying                       Until they pass through the veil of death.
Jesus who is my teacher,                        Enable me to reach my hand and be a companion in their last days       Until they see your hand reach out to them in welcome.
Spirit who lives within us all,                        May my last act of tenderness to someone, be one rooted in the one Love     Until your dance of Death, becomes a dance of resurrection.
Amen
A 'Saint' in the making 